Anniversary Goal

[musculArgirl2]

I was just giving you crap boss. I was thinking of the korean war and the spanish american war and then their is the alamo can't forget that too. Which i believe is the mexican american war. war of 1812 too. there is probably a million military things i've never even learned about really.

[musculArgirl2]

hey karrie, what do you use for counting laps? Do you have a lap counter. I totally space on how many laps i'm doing sometimes. bugs the heck out of me!

[Athene]

Genealogy looks like fun to me, Becky, that's so cool. I looked into my paternal side recently and it was pretty neat - I found out that my Great great grandparents came here from Western Ukraine, via a ship from Hamburg to Halifax, and then on a train into the prairies. They were illiterate (signed their names with Xs) had 6 children, and $60 dollars. They lived in a dugout in the ground for their first winter, then built a house by hand the following spring. It's crazy to think about how much has changed in 3 generations! Life was definitely better for my family here than in Ukraine at the turn of the century. And Boss - you know more about American history than I do!

Training
Warm Up - 3 sets 10 each: pull ups/push ups/air squats/sit ups
WOD - 100 bench press at 95 lbs for time (scaled to 65 lbs)
Flexibility - chest, back, shoulders, hams

Nutrition
8AM - 1 banana, 1 tbsp nut butter (almond/cashew - sooooo good)
12PM - 3 oz turkey breast, 2 cups broccoli slaw, 2 tbsp balsamic vinegar, 1 tbsp nut butter
7PM - 3 eggs, 1/4 cup cheddar, fresh spinach
10PM - 3 oz turkey breast, 9 green olives, 1 banana, 1 tbsp nut butter
11PM - 6 squares milk chocolate

[Athene]

I'm back on the wagon. Phew. Weight is the same as my starting weight, but I'm certain that my measurements have changed - I will confirm that. I'm getting the chain on my bike fixed so that I can quit driving my car to work every day. The last 2 weeks I've been using a car a lot, which I don't like to do. That will jumpstart my weight loss goal, and I still have time to do it. Today was crazy, I worked from 6-2 instead of 9-5, and we were so busy I didn't get a chance to eat properly. When I got home from work I took a nap and had a shower, and my husband wants to take me out for a steak (my favorite) so, I'm about to go do that. Tomorrow I am running 10k for the first time... the goal is to complete the distance without stopping, not think about time at all, since I have never run more than 5k in my life. Wish me luck
PS I missed you guys these past 2 weeks. Hope all is well with you and will get all over your journals in typical Karrie-fashion very soon.

Training
Warm Up - 3 sets 10 each: pull ups/push ups/sit ups/squats
WOD - 5 rounds for time: 10 pull ups/50 air squats
Flexibility - hams, calves, quads, glutes, lats, back, shoulders

Nutrition
5:30 AM - 500 ml coffee with milk, 2 eggs, 1 slice ham
11:30 AM - 3 oz turkey breast, 2 cups broccoli slaw, 2 tbsp balsamic vinegar, 1 tbsp nut butter
7:30 PM - 1 banana, 1 tbsp nut butter

[musculArgirl2]

Genealogy looks like fun to me, Becky, that's so cool. I looked into my paternal side recently and it was pretty neat - I found out that my Great great grandparents came here from Western Ukraine, via a ship from Hamburg to Halifax, and then on a train into the prairies. They were illiterate (signed their names with Xs) had 6 children, and $60 dollars. They lived in a dugout in the ground for their first winter, then built a house by hand the following spring. It's crazy to think about how much has changed in 3 generations! Life was definitely better for my family here than in Ukraine at the turn of the century.

it is interesting!! I love to watch "who do you think you are" on tv each week. It looks so EASY on tv when they do it! we learned that one of our great grandfathers going a quite a few times back was on the mayflower. we are trying to get into the mayflower society. My mom thinks getting into the mayflower society would be pretty neat so we are! LOL We are having a hard time proving one relationship between one our of our great grandfathers and his father. Although it seems pretty obvious that they were related and are father and son. Hopefully one day we will be able to prove it. I'm sure there is a document out there that would do it somewhere.

good luck on the 10k tomorrow! steak = yummy, can't go wrong there!

[Boss Man]

Steeaaaakkk .

You'll be fine with the 10k. GOOD LUCK.

[Athene]

Becky, I realized I didn't answer your question about counting laps: I don't use a counter, but I use a system of sets in my head that helps. I do 4 lengths of front crawl and 1 breast stroke, so if I forget completely I usually can remember within 2 lengths of my distance based on what stroke I'm doing.

Boss, the 10k was fine! Thanks for the support. It took an hour - I was jogging very slowly - because my coach said the point was to go the entire distance without stopping once, and to do that I had to hold myself back at the beginning and really pace myself. Annd.... I didn't have any "accidents"! Luckily there were bathroom breaks plotted along the way, but I didn't need to use them. Running is crazy!

Okay, some big news:
I had a heart-to-heart with my coach about my 20 lbs loss goal, and she was actually very concerned. She said, "Karrie, I'm only going to say this once: You do not have 20 lbs to lose." She also said that she thinks there is a bit of body dysmorphia in me, which concerns her a lot.

We talked about how much stronger I am and how my physique has changed in the last 6 months of training with her, and she said I should maintain my weight, but eat as cleanly as possible and continue working hard in training, so that I keep the muscle I have, and whittle away at the excess body fat that remains without losing my strength gains. She said that for me, losing 20 lbs is not healthy - it might be a previous fight weight, or a bodybuilding weight, but neither of those things are healthy or desirable to maintain long term.

This conversation forced me to think about a lot of things, and it made me realize that I maybe do see myself differently than others. I see myself as someone who clearly has excess weight to lose, but my coach doesn't. I guess I need to make my goals more extreme in order to get motivated about them... like if I shoot for the moon maybe I'll at least "land amongst the stars" (even thought the moon is way closer than the stars, you all know the saying )

I feel kind of stuck. But I'm already on a path, I guess. I need to clean up my eating totally and make it a habit, and not something I just force myself to do until my weight hits an arbitrary number I have chosen out of the sky. I have never weighed 140 in my adult life, so I'm not even sure where that came from. I weighed 133 when I was 10, and then 146 when I was 12, and I've always been over 155 lbs since then. I don't even know when I decided 140 was a good goal.

What do you guys think of all this?

[Boss Man]

A strong 140, is perfectly reasonable and as long as you stick to the right kind of eating patterns and keep pushing yourself hard on the weights in particular, you can do so much.

Be proud of yourself Karrie, but don't ever be too hard on yourself and don't be afraid to question what you are doing sometimes, or feel like you might be doing something wrong. Admitting what seem like possible failures is not weakness, it's about saying hey I might not be doing things quite right now and may need to change.

You are a tough cookie but also a true, honest and educated person, who can certainly find the mental discipline to do this, because you are someone who trys to help others "stick at it", so you have what it takes to give to others and therefore you have what it takes to give to yourself, as much as is needed.

You CAN do this and you CAN succeed. You are strong, healthy, young and capable and you know deep down how capable and able you are, so I'm not telling you something you didn't realise before, but I'm telling you something that is TRUE .

You can give yourself a body that will hopefully last a lifetime, by being sensible and applying some knowledge to the hard effort.

Keep believing and keep pushing, because if you want it, it's all there for you and you will become more amazing than you think you are now.

GOOD LUCK and don't forget that there are plenty of people behind you and if you ever need to vent, message me sometime and we'll talk things through .

[musculArgirl2]

I saw your pic from last year karrie and your weight was around 150 and you looked in great shape there. So i dunno what you would look at 140?? Maybe don't aim for a certain amount. I think maybe just continue eating healthy and continue working out and see where your weight lands and how you feel. But it's Totally up to you!
It's your journey and you know your body and weight history the best and you also know what your goals are for what you want to achieve! But we are definitely here for your support!!!!

[Athene]

Boss and Becky: thank you genuinely for your thoughts on my question. I have been thinking about this all week and feel much more secure and balanced in my thoughts about it.

Boss: I completely agree. I could weigh 140 lbs and be completely healthy. I'm not sure where my coach is coming from with the body dysmorphia thing - I think that she possibly mistakes my dissatisfaction with my physique for a warped perception of it. I know I'm not overweight, but I'm not in the shape I want to be in.

Becky: Thanks for checking those out. Those pics show me that my composition was more desirable at 150ish than at 160ish, but if I was ripped I know I wouldn't care what I weighed, and that is the direction in which I'd like to move.

The crux of it is that I don't think I should be fixating on a number (ie. "weigh 140 lbs"), but I do think I need to take myself up on the challenge to be awesome rather than mediocre in pursuit of my fitness and body composition goals. I have been half-assing it all this time, and I need to approach this, "whole ass" I need to do this for me, for all the reasons I set the goal in the first place, and it starts and ends with training and discipline. The rest of my life is in check, I can work toward this in an intense and enthusiastic way, which is my way, but I have to sustain it and care about what I do every day, not putting off the "whole ass" effort "for tomorrow", while half-assing it today.

So here it is: I'm going to be awesome every day. That means not accepting mediocrity in myself. I know what that means - I don't have to make rules or subscribe to anything specific: sticking to healthy, nutritious fuel as often as possible, limiting and cherishing treats/cheats, and training like my life depends on it. So I'm going to do that, and this will become the "Awesome Log, of how I was awesome every day for X amount of days and changed my life" lol or something similar. That was always the goal, even when I first started coming here, and it remains unfulfilled not because my weight has not changed to an arbitrary number on the scale, but because I have not dedicated myself to training and nutrition in the way that I know I can and desire so much.

Lifestyle
Lots of sitting at my desk today, drove to and from work.

Training
Warm Up - 500 m row, 3 sets 10 each: pull ups, squats, push ups, sit ups
Olympic Lift - Power Clean 5-5-5 @ 85%
Conditioning - 10 rounds for time: 6 push ups + 30 sec plank hold
Mobility/Stretching

Nutrition
9:00 AM - whey shake, 1 banana, 1 tbsp nut butter
12:00 PM - 500 ml black coffee
1:00 PM - 1 cup ground beef w/ taco seasoning, 1 cup chopped green pepper/onion/tomato/jalapeno ("Paleo Tacos" )
6:30 PM - 1 banana, 1 tbsp nut butter
11:00 PM - 1 tin hardwood smoked oysters, 2 cups green salad

[Boss Man]

So what was that eating about today, as I noticed a 5.5 hour meal space, followed by some nut Butter and a banana and then 4.5 hours until the next meal.

Definitely room for another meal in there somewhere, but obviously I'm not criticising, just curious.

[Athene]

So what was that eating about today, as I noticed a 5.5 hour meal space, followed by some nut Butter and a banana and then 4.5 hours until the next meal.

Definitely room for another meal in there somewhere, but obviously I'm not criticising, just curious.

It was intense right? I was hungry all day, work was just really busy. I was happy that I ate as many times as I did I have to make sure I don't eat 3 hours before a workout as well, or I'll puke.

Lifestyle
Biked 10k to work = 25 mins
Sat at a desk for most of the day, walking around/active for 2 hours outside of workouts and commute

Training
Warm Up - 500 m row, 3 sets 10 each: pull ups, squats, push ups, v-ups
WOD - Shorty: 20 min AMRAP of 21 Deadlifts, 15 Overhead Squats, 9 Thrusters @ 65 lbs (scaled to 55 lbs for me)
Mobility/Stretching

Nutrition
7:00 AM - whey shake, banana, 1 tbsp nut butter
11:30 AM - Paleo Tacos (1 cup beef, 1 cup sauteed veg, salsa)
5:30 PM - 1 can tuna (basil with sundried tomatoes one)
8:00 PM - CHEAT MEAL: large thin crust pizza (chicken, green pepper, onion, bacon, cheddar), Coke
***Note*** Next Cheat Meal scheduled for May 26 or later

[fitoverforty]

1 can tuna (basil with sundried tomatoes one)

is that good? I've been wanting to try that , but wasn't sure if I would like it.

Warm Up - 500 m row, 3 sets 10 each: pull ups, squats, push ups, v-ups

this is your warm up? you are amazing, just sayin'.

20 min AMRAP of 21 Deadlifts, 15 Overhead Squats, 9 Thrusters @ 65 lbs (scaled to 55 lbs for me)
Mobility/Stretching

okay, I'm exhausted now after reading all of this...you are doing excellent!

[Boss Man]

However if you don't eat within 3 hours of a workout, it may make you struggle, as that's almost like training on empty.

[Athene]

1 can tuna (basil with sundried tomatoes one)

is that good? I've been wanting to try that , but wasn't sure if I would like it.

I like the flavoured tuna once in a while, they're moist and flavoured in a pretty inoffensive way, I find - I have a Peanut Satay one that I am excited to try, too.

Warm Up - 500 m row, 3 sets 10 each: pull ups, squats, push ups, v-ups

this is your warm up? you are amazing, just sayin'.

Aw, thanks Lynne! But I feel bad acting like it's hard because anyone can do it It's a typical CrossFit warm up, and I don't do it quickly, it takes about 15 minutes. It's the time to work on technique, and to level up those skills. For example, I started doing the push ups on a 24" incline, and am down to 9" on a bad day, and the floor on a good day. With pull ups I moved from the heaviest resistance band (relieving me of about 80 lbs of bodyweight) down to the skinniest band (relieving about 20 lbs), and can even do a few pull ups unassisted now. After the warm up I take a few minutes' break, set-up for the WOD, and do that at a much more intense pace.

20 min AMRAP of 21 Deadlifts, 15 Overhead Squats, 9 Thrusters @ 65 lbs (scaled to 55 lbs for me)
Mobility/Stretching

okay, I'm exhausted now after reading all of this...you are doing excellent!

Thanks, Lynne Right back 'atcha. It was a really tough workout, mentally and physically. I'm still pretty weak, in relative terms, so I'm trying to do more work like this.

However if you don't eat within 3 hours of a workout, it may make you struggle, as that's almost like training on empty.

True. Do you think that's problematic? I notice it affects my energy levels, but on the plus side: I don't vomit during workouts.

Lifestyle
Walked to and from the pool in the morning
Had a nice day in the sun: walked around for 3-4 hours
2-3 hours seated/driving/sitting on the computer

Training
100 m front crawl for quality, x 4 sets
100 m flutterkick for speed, x 4 sets

Nutrition
9:00 AM - 1/2 cup Red River Cereal with milk (wheat, barley, flax, rye, all grain cereal - craving), 500 ml black coffee
12:00 PM - 4 oz baked salmon, 1 cup sweet potato, 1/2 cup fresh fruit mix (watermelon, pineapple, kiwi)
5:00 PM - 5 oz smoked white fish, 3 cups green salad, 2 tbsp vinegarette, 7 cherry tomatoes
7:00 PM - 1 large latte (whole milk and espresso, no sweetener)