It does take a little courage and heart sometimes to say, hey, I'm screwing up in some way and I don't like it. People don't like admitting to failings, because it's like a kind of self harming of the mind or a form of emotional punishment if you will.
Logically who wants to talk negatively about themselves, even if sometimes they force themselves to, as a first step towards some sort of salvation or redemption.
Hi there I'm Mr / Mrs / Ms X and i'm an alcoholic.
Catharticism can be a great healer, when used by the exponent to educate themselves, as opposed to being used as a stick to beat themselves, leading to feelings of failure and potentially more mishaps.
Being human is prfectly okay, because it means you feel things, you possess conscience and you have a well developed sense of right and wrong, on both a wide scale and a personal level.
So I don't want you to feel silly or ashamed Karrie, for admitting you have been human and done what was not supposed to happen
.I want you to feel a sense of pride, that you admitted to the sort(s) of things that possibly, (I don't know this), you might have hidden away and remained in denial of in the past
.It's by admitting these things, that you can identify cause and "negative effect", then workout how to change things, to create cause and "positive effect".
You're a really, really wonderful and touching human being, with a warm heart, so don't be too hard on yourself okay. Keep believing, keep pushing and keep learning from all this as you go, because you are a strong and capable Lady and you should be proud of what you have been able to achieve in the past few years, especially to bounce back from a difficult injury and be able to work with others and motivate them to be better people.
Your work is an indicator of your own personal traits and how much value you possess as a person. Let the things that make you you, be big tools to make progress. Use that warmth and motivation for others, for yourself too and that intelligence as well and make the right choices based on knowledge, intuition and feeling, okay
.It's all there for you if you want it, inside your head and heart, so don't doubt yourself when you speak negatively of yourself and don't be afraid to speak negatively sometimes, if it must be so, because doing such things allows confrontation of what shouldn't be, so what should be can be worked at better.
I want to send you a BIG PAT ON THE BACK because I want people like you to know I'm proud of you, that I understand you and that what you say doesn't make me critical of you, but able to realise how human it makes you, which is a really good thing.
You're a great, great person Karrie, so chin up, keep pushing and don't stop believing yeah
.Myself and others have got your back, so it's all good
.THANKS as always for the time you spend responding to others, you are too kind and truly appreciated as well
.You WILL get where you want to be in the end, so be patient and cut yourself a little slack when needs be and if it ever gets a bit much drop me a message anytime and we'll work things through together for your own good and possibly the good of those around you, if it involves others too.
You have always more than earned any one to one I can give
.
Boss: Thank you so much for the kind words. It means a lot when I'm feeling exposed and vulnerable about weaknesses. This log is making me face a lot of things, and I think you're right about how I may have been in denial about it the past. Writing it down is making me own up to it in a way that I think will be good for me long term. I've always been like this, so I have to deal with it and get over it sometime, why not in these 20 weeks? I still have 17 weeks left to drop the 20 lbs, so I'm just going to keep journaling meals and training, and try to stay positive so that I can make positive changes, rather than beat myself up and give in to failure. 
) to cut down on the sugar. That's what i do lots of times on family birthday cakes. 