Thank you for sharing this Christina and I want to tell you I am so, so proud of you misses
for telling us about this and for having the courage to admit something upsetting and difficult to experience. I'm not sure you really know just how strong you can be sometimes, but when you talk so openly and so beautifully, it makes me happy to see you showing heart and courage, instead of using what you felt as a stick to constantly beat yourself with.
It doesn't matter what people used to say to you, they are less of an influence now and this is for every word they said and everything they should never have meant or intended. You're better than them, because you possess a wonderful heartfelt purity and a lot of sunshine and inner light and you need to focus on ALL your positives and use them to help you succeed and not let things in your past, that should stay exactly where they belong, in the past, to affect how you make your future work out.
I'm sending you a BIG HUG
You are a wonderful person and you mustn't ever feel like a failure or a person who cannot succeed. YES you can succeed, but you're also human and you need to recognise that too. You can't approach something with a robotic state of mind and just bang out every workout and eat every designated calorie but no more.
What you do sometimes is make human mistakes, but they are a chance to learn something and become stronger and you are NOT a can't person, because this IS a process you can gain greater mastery of and CAN win at.
There is plenty of strength here for you, but be strong for yourself, because you REALLY can be and with a wonderful heart like yours, you actually DO have the emotional and mental tools to succeed, so don't you ever forget that and just keep on pushing and keep letting us know how you're doing, so we can continue to do our bit.
You can be so proud of speaking about things like this and you need to know just what a positive and enriching effect it can have on you progress, becasue it allows you to confront things, not hide them away and continuously punish yourself with them.
There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with you emotionally or mentally, so you don't have to correct problems, unless you make the problems happen and become a victim of a viscious cycle. You CAN get on top of things and keep on smiling and believing.
Most of all, don't ever change the person you are inside, because you have a lovely nature and personality and having the kind of upbringing you appear to have had, you can be proud of not turning out bitter, resentful or very negative, or worse a copy of the bad attitudes shown to you by elders.GOOD LUCK
and no worries okay. You've had times where you done great in the past with all this and you WILL DO again okay.